Renaissance...Uh...Reborn

Greetings Friends, Random Visitors and Jerky Lurkers!

Hopefully all is well these days.

As I mention from time to time, I do a lot of driving during the week…

I’m not sure how many of you remember the show “BJ & the Bear” …Basically it was the story of a handsome young chimp who traveled around the country in a red and white big rig with some guy…(Sorta like Chewbacca did with that Han Solo guy)…

~oOo~

Michelangelo Buonarroti famously believed
that statues lay hidden, imprisoned within marble blocks...

I wonder if he had any idea that his "David"
would one day be used to peddle third-rate cola.

As he laboured on the Sistine ceiling...

I wonder if he could even fathom that eventually
his “Creation of Adam” (above) would be
used to push third-rate diet cola…

(It's not that President's Choice is necessarily
"third-rate" in terms of Cola... But one cannot
ignore Coke and Pepsi as the Big Two)...

Anyway, I think I have reached my image quota with our good pal Blog-O...So I'll wrap it up...

But before I go, Do you recognize this painting by any chance?


If not, it's Raphael's "School of Athens", 1509.
Some of the artists pictured include
Michelangelo (as Heraclitus) and Leonardo da Vinci (as Plato).

But if you look closer, you may recognize the two figures in the periphery...

Yup. These fellows were used for the Guns N' Roses
"Use Your Illusion I & II" album covers...(Uncredited, I might add) ...

I guess in these unoriginal times, it must be OK to reduce the works of great artists to something marketable or easy to absorb...and if said works are old enough, you can use them for free! (I think...But please don't quote me on that)...It's sorta like when you know a song from a commercial for something (that you don't remember) and much later you realize it was actually a hit song from before you were born...Or like when you find out that a film is a re-make or re-imagining or whatever...but you had never heard of the original...Or when you're aware of the original, but want to see the re-make...to see how it has been improved/modernized...(quite often, it's not as good though)...

Anyway, as I was looking for some of the stuff mentioned above, I was glad to see that the good folks at Symantec have aligned themselves with the Da Vinci mania that has been sweeping the nation of late...

(Sorry for the shakiness of the drive-by pix...Some were taken at high speeds)...

I think that's it for now. It's getting late. I'll try to post again real soon.

Take care out there!

Your Pal,

Zambo.

P.S.

I didn't get to post the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle pic that I had planned on sticking in there somewhere...

Hey Bloggerinos!

Hopefully things are running smoothly for you these days…


You know, it must be hard growing up with a stripper for a mother…You have “friends”, but you’re never quite sure if they actually like you or just wanna be near your mom…in case she should happen to get naked at any point in time…There certainly is a lot of potential for trauma here…This occurred to me as Beatdogg and I went out for lunch today and there was a “stripper-hot” woman with her young son coming out of the bank…The kid will be nearly invisible for most of his formative years, I fear…But we had a rather enjoyable lunch despite all this…

~oOo~

The other day I saw a promotional clip of that new Vaughn-ifer (sorry) project, “The Break-Up” and I saw a fellow who looked very familiar. I was almost positive it was the guy who played little Ralphie (Peter Billingsley) in “A Christmas Story” …

So I looked it up, and it was! I really like that movie around the holidays…Then I remembered that the fella who played Flick (Scott Schwartz) had fallen on hard times as an actor and had ended up working in the adult film industry for a while…He was the kid who got his tongue stuck to the metal pole in the film…(Despite his apparent fondness for licking poles, I believe he was in straight porn)…

Blogger isn't allowing me to post any more pix, so I guess that's it for tonight...

Take care out there!

Your Pal,

Zambo.

It Was Going to Be My Best Post Ever!...Maybe...

Greetings Friends, Random Visitors and Jerky Lurkers!

I hope all is well wherever you may be when you read this…

So last night I was all excited because Howard Stern was going to have The Artie Lange Roast starting at 6pm…(They did their regular 6am show ‘til whenever ~ usually 11-ish ~ and then they would be returning to roast Artie). For those of you not familiar with a roast, it's basically a facetious tribute, as at a banquet, in which the honoree is alternately praised and insulted. (From Dictionary.com)...

This image was posted on howardstern.com and is the work of Timothy Shamey.

The roast went until 10pm and then the Wrap-Up show was on…To describe the events that took place could never do them justice…But trust me…It was pretty fucking funny! Check out the Stern web site for the roast summary, if you’re interested…(It hasn't been posted yet as I write this. Or check out MarksFriggin.com for a summary that's there now)...

At one point I laughed so hard that I started to cough, then to choke and then I felt a shooting, burning sensation in the vein that runs along my right temple…I was concerned momentarily, but luckily it passed…Soon enough I was laughing again…(I could see the headline: “Howard Stern Kills Local Man: Laughed Himself to Death!”)…

Anyhow, I got so wrapped up in Artie-mania that I totally forgot to watch “The Ultimate Fighter”! It’s so unlike me to totally forget that one of my “Must-See TV” shows is on…But don’t cry for me, for it shall air again Saturday night…and then on Monday again, I think…

At 11pm, I began watching “The Daily Show”…That’s when I realized that I had forgotten something, but it was too late…Oh well…It’s odd that entertaining radio took precedence over my good pal TV…Then I started to work on what may have been my most personal and revealing Blog entry to date…I was a little nervous about posting it…When I got it the way I liked it, I hit the PUBLISH POST button, and imagine my disappointment when this screen came up:

Something like this screen, anyway...

Some might believe that there were forces out there that prevented me from posting this particular post, because it was so personal and so revealing…There was even a real photo of me!!! It was a picture of me in a loincloth, from back in my competitive bodybuilding days…But alas, like a beautiful sunset, the moment can never be duplicated…It’s for the best, since it was an uncharacteristic moment of weakness…It probably won’t happen again for another 30 or so years…

You have no one but Blogger to thank/blame for this unfortunate set of circumstances...

~oOo~

Tonight we are going to see Jon Stewart at Casino Rama! I guess some people would be amped...or jazzed...or even stoked...I'm looking forward to it...I think it will be pretty funny and I'm lugging my copy of America ...There's a part of me that would like him to sign it...but there's a part of me that realizes this probably won't happen...Also, there's a no cameras policy in effect, so I probably won't get a picture of him either...I guess I'll have to rely on memory for this one...

Have a swell weekend...and for goodness sake, take care out there, people!

Your Pal,

Zambo.

P.S.

Artie Lange's "Beer League" opens September 15th, 2006!

...and will close on September 18th, according to Shuli's roast material...

"Beer League? If I wanted to see a movie with an ugly guy with tits swinging a bat, I’d just check out Rosie O’Donnell in A League of Their Own… "~Sal the Stockbroker~

Check out Artie's website for more info...

UPDATE:

We just got back from seeing Jon Stewart...It's a little after 3:30am...The night was filled with all sorts of emotions...There was the wondering if we'd get there in time...We left worksville at around 5 and got to the casino at a little after 8...The show was scheduled to begin at 9...traffic was a bit slow and Casino Rama is way north...(I'm not quite sure how they score the performers they get way the hell out there)...

Anyway, we got to the casino and we thought we should grab something to eat... We decided to go straight there to save time and that turned out to be a not-so-great idea...We ended up waiting in a line for like 30 minutes to get a sandwich, a bagel, a salad and two cans of apple juice for like $16...But we powered through our meal quick and dirty style and got to the auditorium just as they announced the doors were about to open...

Last month when I ordered the tickets online, Ticketmaster claimed that I would be sold the best available seats for this event...There was a nice little "convenience charge" too...Each ticket cost $92.50 ($87.75 + $4.75) so I figured we'd be fairly close to the stage...I didn't really check the exact location or the cost at the time...As it turns out, our seats were located at the very back left corner of the auditorium, in the upper deck...Jon Stewart looked about 1/2 an inch tall...Luckily there was a huge TV screen on either side of him...As soon as the show started, the disappointment began to fade away...Basically, it was 1 1/2 hours of non-stop laughs...He was really funny! His jokes were topical and delivered with his usual clever timing...He discussed politics, religion, science, pets and various other topics...It was a top-notch performance. He interacted with the audience a bit and it was an overall great night! Three guys got there late and tried to sneak to their seats...in the second row...(They must have sold a child into slavery to get those seats)...Anyway, Stewart asked them, "Where the fuck were you three?!?" They said their bus was late and he mocked them a little more...Then the camera guy focused on them and Stewart said, "Why are you filming them? They're nobodies! Up here!" I was cracking up...

Needless to say, I was lugging his book around all night for nothing...After the show, we decided to do a little gambling...So we hit the nickel slots...Lasagna and I each put a crisp $20 bill into the machines and we began our session...As a rule, I generally don't like to gamble...but when I do, I bet the max for maximum return...So after three or four spins, I won 5100 credits or $255...We decided to cash out at 4000 ($200) and to call it a night...Just then Lasagna got 845 credits ($42.25)...So we decided to pack it in...

After we cashed out, we drove back to worksville and Lasagna followed me home...I checked on the pool temperature...69 degrees Farenheit, or 20.5 degrees Celsius...I turned on the heater 'cause we're having people over to swim tomorrow (today really) and Sunday...Hopefully the weather's nice...Or else we'll have to entertain our guests in some other way...

The Artie Roast is being replayed as I type this...Life ain't so bad at the moment...

I guess I should get some rest...

Your Pal,

Chatty Zambo...

Quick Update...

Hey Kids!

Hopefully everybody had a great weekend and the week is off to a good start...

Admittedly, this is a bit of a fluff entry to share what I've been up to the past few days...

I did some work around the house...

A little bit of gardening and lawn maintenance...

Went for several refreshing dips...

Worked the grill a little...

Went on a few runs to the store to replenish supplies...

Visited with the folks...

Got a hair cut...

Though I didn't get to go for a bike ride, check out my cool gorilla horn...Pretty sweet, huh?...

I guess that kinda sums up what I've been up to lately...In case you were wondering...

Maybe my next post will be a bit more profound and/or thought-provoking...

Take care out there, Buddies!

Your Pal,

Zambo.

Hot Days...

Hey Gang!

I have to admit that I have totally sucked at keeping up with the Blog action these days...But last night I had planned on going home and catching up on all my pals' Blogs...Worksville was hit with a tornado warning, according to all the chicken littles around the roost...

As I was driving home, I found myself in a downpour that rivaled the one in "Identity"...There was a moment where I actually thought about turning back...But then, as I got closer to home, things were clear and bright...So I did some routine "just-got-home" stuff, then went for a swim!

It's been pretty darn hot these days...If you look at my last summer's heat gauge, it's even hotter this year and it's only June first...

My main short-term goal these past few days has been to power through the work day and get home for a swim before dark...I'm a simple man and have simple needs. There's something quite soothing about swimming. The volume on everything else gets turned way down and other stuff doesn't seem to matter as much when I'm swimming...

After a hard day at the Dream Academy, it's nice to take a dip...I got sorta depressed during the winter when the pool was closed, but the funk has lifted recently...I feel happier...(Even though it's been pretty humid)...

On the weekends we tend to do a lot around the yard and I tend to "sweat like a motherfucker" if you will...My only solace comes from knowing that I get to take the plunge when all the labour is over. Getting a house with a pool and subscribing to SIRIUS satellite radio are among the best decisions I have ever made in my life...(Plus tricking Lasagna into falling for me)...

Anyway, last year I always prepared myself to find dead beasts in the pool's skimmer, but there were none...So far this season, we have already found three fallen beasts: a mouse and two birds...I'm a little suspicious about the birds...seems odd...Lasagna has what can be described as a Hitchcockian fear of birds...So she insisted that I dispose of them immediately...If we have another, I'm gonna have to examine the body and maybe take it to a lab...'cause that's just plain weird...(I hope it's not West Nile... Maybe they're just bad swimmers...or maybe it's just a local kid shooting them with his Red Ryder BB Gun for kicks...I'll keep you posted...Hopefully)...

So we watched "Hostel" last night...It was interesting to see how different people choose to amuse themselves...The college-aged guys were looking to get laid and score drugs...the gang of kids would terrorize tourists to score treats, the local crack whores would lure young men to horrific situations for money and the bored, rich men would do all sorts of depraved stuff to get a thrill...I won't spoil it in case you plan on watching it...I'm pretty desensitized to most forms of violence, but there is at least one cringe-worthy scene...In the Special Features, director Eli Roth mentions that the story was inspired by stories of rich guys going to Thailand and paying lots of money to "get to" shoot people in the head for a rush...Roth said he wanted to do a documentary, but found that it would be pretty dangerous...You can also see the street kids bust out the moves behind the scenes...Those little Czech kids sure can break dance! It was an oversimplified film overall, but still pretty good. Kinda predictable, but it got its point across. I was reminded of such films as "Hard Target" and "Surviving the Game" ...where the rich dudes hunt men as the ultimate prey...But the guys in this film are more like the time I saw celebrities hunting boars that were pretty much plunked right in front of them...All they had to do was pull the trigger...Good for them! They are the nation's true heroes, I think...So brave and powerful...(In case you're reading this literally, I am kidding...I think they're assholes)...I guess this practise is referred to as a canned hunt ...

~oOo~

In other news, Lasagna and I are going to see Jon Stewart in two weeks! He'll be at a nearby casino...It should be good. Here's a clip from "The Daily Show", featuring Mr. Fumbles, one of the show's writers.

Take care out there!

Your Pal,

Zambo.

P.S.

Blogger has ceased allowing images to be posted...or I would have posted a few more...Oh well...At least I got to add a Blogroll...(If you're a regular visitor and I haven't listed you, please let me know and I'll add you to the list)...