Another Long Post...(Sorry)
Hello everybody!
If you tried to access Blogger any time yesterday, you probably experienced all sorts of difficulties. It would seem that Blogger was down and I checked on Google to see what was going on… It seems that “significant hardware trouble” was to blame…
I hope that everyone was able to re-group and sort things out. I noticed that some of the blogs I visit regularly were doing funny things while I was able to access them…mostly comment numbers not corresponding with actual number of comments and I even saw a post disappear that was there earlier (Sherry’s)…
Your Money’s No Good Here
A brief glimpse into the future…Yesterday I took my car in for an oil change…While I was waiting, I did some shopping…I went back to get the car, but it wasn’t ready yet…This was Canadian Tire by the way…(A sorta lesser version of Home Depot with a better automotive section)…Anyway, I decided that I’d buy some more stuff while I was waiting…Then there was a power surge and the lights flickered. Emergency generators kicked in, but all registers were down and the sales associates were scrambling to hand-write receipts using pricing guns to scan the merch. I was going to pay using debit (Interac)…but no dice! I did have an emergency supply of US funds in my pocket and I asked one of the ladies who was frantically scanning and writing out receipts if they would take American money. She told me that she didn’t see why not…Hardly comforting…So I took my receipt and waited in line…I had a feeling it wasn’t gonna work out, but I tried to be positive…So I waited my turn, while people were scrambling as though under attack and trying to reload in time…I finally got to the register and told the pretty young lady with the nose ring that I had US funds…She looked stunned. She asked a “lifer” (who seemed grumbly) if they could take US funds. She grunted or something…as if she was amused, yet disgusted simultaneously… “We barely even have cash registers!” was all she said. The pretty girl apologized. She said I could leave the stuff I was gonna buy on the counter. I went to see how the old guy in Automotive was doing with my car…by the time I got to the other end of the store, they had regained full power, Interac and all. So I waited a few more minutes and then he called my name. I paid by Interac and went out to my car. Then I went back in and asked another cashier if everything was restored. She said yes, so I grabbed the stuff from the other counter and purchased it…Something similar happened once at the university library when all the computers went down. I was borrowing about 15 books at the time (this was before the internet had all the answers)…All hell broke loose…The library folks were busy writing out reference numbers and sweating…I think when the machines fail, we’re gonna be well and truly fucked…for a while at least…
In Other News
In the real world, Al "Grandpa Munster" Lewis died, Richie and Heather are splitsville...so are Lance and Sheryl...Mick Jagger is in better shape than I am...Paris Hilton's diaries are for sale...
Speaking of spoiled little bitches, apparently Jack Osbourne is an adrenaline junkie...Really? That's weird, 'cause he just seems like a lazy, doughy arrogant little man-child…with a rich dad...I can’t believe he actually beat a trained tai boxer…I wonder how much they paid the guy to take a dive…
I wrote the following when they re-aired Oprah's first interview with James Frey over the holidays, but didn't post it at the time because I thought it seemed petty and negative...So I filed it away:
Let’s make this loser who has lived his whole life up until now in a hedonistic fashion (under the guise of “addiction”) a millionaire…because he wrote about it and because Oprah says it’s OK…Fuck overcoming adversity. What about the guy who works hard his whole life for a fuckin’ watch? In all seriousness: Fuck you, James Frey.
If only I’d have fucked up my life so bad that I had “hit rock bottom”…then written about it, instead of trying to live up to expectations and “succeed”…maybe I could be Oprah’s sweetheart of the week too. It’s so funny because she mentioned how she’s so glad she chose the book because it’s “changing so many lives” and the online message board is being filled with comments…Way to go, O! You’re so great!
Frey had Oprah up all night though. I don't know if even Steadman can make that claim...
Look for James’ upcoming book, “How I Squandered My Million Little Dollars” …You’d like to think that he wrote the book to help others…but as he says, he’s not a good person…It’s like people hearing a song that they think was written for them…Like the guy in “Imagine” asking John Lennon if he wrote songs for him [I referenced this in an earlier post already]…We watch this James Frey guy visiting a woman in rehab, Sandy, and she says she’s never experienced someone who knows exactly what she’s going through…Perhaps I’m just jealous. Maybe I wanna be Oprah’s Best Selling sweetheart too. She could take me under her enormous wing…But sadly I’ve spent the better part of my years in college and university…then working…and all that other shit people are trained to do…[I know: Wah! Poor me…I said it was negative and petty]…
So the lesson here kids, is to fuck everything up. Do all the wrong things, hang with the wrong crowd, drop out of school, do drugs…The key is to stay alive and turn things around. Redemption; overcoming adversity…and remorse…definitely remorse. People seem to love talking about how they’ve been victimized or how they had to overcome some terrible situation.
Then there was the Larry King interview…Oprah made the call to back Frey in his time of need…According to the big O despite the small percentage of the book’s details that were inaccurate, the message was what really mattered…
Then I guess her lawyers or someone got to her and told her to do a “Tear the Ass Outta James Frey” show. Better than a clip show, I guess. I didn’t see the follow-up interview, but I got the rundown from a few sources…Oprah didn’t want to give the impression that the truth doesn’t matter. After all her reputation is on the line.
Oprah: I think you presented a false person.
Audience: (Applauds as though something important has occurred).
Under interrogation regarding the alleged root canals without novacaine:
James Frey:I’ve struggled with the idea of it…
Oprah: No. The lie of it!
Audience: (Thunderous applause).
This story has turned into the tale of how some bum who can spin a good yarn made The Great and Powerful Oprah look bad. “It’s difficult to talk to you because I really feel duped!” Poor rich Oprah...
I wonder if she’s still glad she chose him…
If you haven’t tired of reading about this guy and want to read some funny stuff, check out Jay Pinkerton’s Contested Pieces from Frey Memoir.
Anyway...I certainly did go on and on there...Sorry.
Valentine's Day
So Valentine's Day is fast approaching...What's everybody got planned? Personally, I find it hard to outdo some of the stuff I've done in the past. There's a guy I know who always gets annoyed whenever I do something nice for Lasagna. (I don't really go around telling people that stuff, but he always asks). He's the kind of guy that complains all the time and actually says the word "Sigh" more than anyone really should...I think he thinks that his wife will somehow find out and expect him to do more...I think that we should be nice all the time and not just wait for these consumer holidays to do nice stuff for people...(Yet I still go overboard at Christmas and Valentine's Day for some reason)...
If you tried to access Blogger any time yesterday, you probably experienced all sorts of difficulties. It would seem that Blogger was down and I checked on Google to see what was going on… It seems that “significant hardware trouble” was to blame…
I hope that everyone was able to re-group and sort things out. I noticed that some of the blogs I visit regularly were doing funny things while I was able to access them…mostly comment numbers not corresponding with actual number of comments and I even saw a post disappear that was there earlier (Sherry’s)…
Your Money’s No Good Here
A brief glimpse into the future…Yesterday I took my car in for an oil change…While I was waiting, I did some shopping…I went back to get the car, but it wasn’t ready yet…This was Canadian Tire by the way…(A sorta lesser version of Home Depot with a better automotive section)…Anyway, I decided that I’d buy some more stuff while I was waiting…Then there was a power surge and the lights flickered. Emergency generators kicked in, but all registers were down and the sales associates were scrambling to hand-write receipts using pricing guns to scan the merch. I was going to pay using debit (Interac)…but no dice! I did have an emergency supply of US funds in my pocket and I asked one of the ladies who was frantically scanning and writing out receipts if they would take American money. She told me that she didn’t see why not…Hardly comforting…So I took my receipt and waited in line…I had a feeling it wasn’t gonna work out, but I tried to be positive…So I waited my turn, while people were scrambling as though under attack and trying to reload in time…I finally got to the register and told the pretty young lady with the nose ring that I had US funds…She looked stunned. She asked a “lifer” (who seemed grumbly) if they could take US funds. She grunted or something…as if she was amused, yet disgusted simultaneously… “We barely even have cash registers!” was all she said. The pretty girl apologized. She said I could leave the stuff I was gonna buy on the counter. I went to see how the old guy in Automotive was doing with my car…by the time I got to the other end of the store, they had regained full power, Interac and all. So I waited a few more minutes and then he called my name. I paid by Interac and went out to my car. Then I went back in and asked another cashier if everything was restored. She said yes, so I grabbed the stuff from the other counter and purchased it…Something similar happened once at the university library when all the computers went down. I was borrowing about 15 books at the time (this was before the internet had all the answers)…All hell broke loose…The library folks were busy writing out reference numbers and sweating…I think when the machines fail, we’re gonna be well and truly fucked…for a while at least…
In Other News
In the real world, Al "Grandpa Munster" Lewis died, Richie and Heather are splitsville...so are Lance and Sheryl...Mick Jagger is in better shape than I am...Paris Hilton's diaries are for sale...
Speaking of spoiled little bitches, apparently Jack Osbourne is an adrenaline junkie...Really? That's weird, 'cause he just seems like a lazy, doughy arrogant little man-child…with a rich dad...I can’t believe he actually beat a trained tai boxer…I wonder how much they paid the guy to take a dive…
I wrote the following when they re-aired Oprah's first interview with James Frey over the holidays, but didn't post it at the time because I thought it seemed petty and negative...So I filed it away:
Let’s make this loser who has lived his whole life up until now in a hedonistic fashion (under the guise of “addiction”) a millionaire…because he wrote about it and because Oprah says it’s OK…Fuck overcoming adversity. What about the guy who works hard his whole life for a fuckin’ watch? In all seriousness: Fuck you, James Frey.
If only I’d have fucked up my life so bad that I had “hit rock bottom”…then written about it, instead of trying to live up to expectations and “succeed”…maybe I could be Oprah’s sweetheart of the week too. It’s so funny because she mentioned how she’s so glad she chose the book because it’s “changing so many lives” and the online message board is being filled with comments…Way to go, O! You’re so great!
Frey had Oprah up all night though. I don't know if even Steadman can make that claim...
Look for James’ upcoming book, “How I Squandered My Million Little Dollars” …You’d like to think that he wrote the book to help others…but as he says, he’s not a good person…It’s like people hearing a song that they think was written for them…Like the guy in “Imagine” asking John Lennon if he wrote songs for him [I referenced this in an earlier post already]…We watch this James Frey guy visiting a woman in rehab, Sandy, and she says she’s never experienced someone who knows exactly what she’s going through…Perhaps I’m just jealous. Maybe I wanna be Oprah’s Best Selling sweetheart too. She could take me under her enormous wing…But sadly I’ve spent the better part of my years in college and university…then working…and all that other shit people are trained to do…[I know: Wah! Poor me…I said it was negative and petty]…
So the lesson here kids, is to fuck everything up. Do all the wrong things, hang with the wrong crowd, drop out of school, do drugs…The key is to stay alive and turn things around. Redemption; overcoming adversity…and remorse…definitely remorse. People seem to love talking about how they’ve been victimized or how they had to overcome some terrible situation.
Then there was the Larry King interview…Oprah made the call to back Frey in his time of need…According to the big O despite the small percentage of the book’s details that were inaccurate, the message was what really mattered…
Then I guess her lawyers or someone got to her and told her to do a “Tear the Ass Outta James Frey” show. Better than a clip show, I guess. I didn’t see the follow-up interview, but I got the rundown from a few sources…Oprah didn’t want to give the impression that the truth doesn’t matter. After all her reputation is on the line.
Oprah: I think you presented a false person.
Audience: (Applauds as though something important has occurred).
Under interrogation regarding the alleged root canals without novacaine:
James Frey:I’ve struggled with the idea of it…
Oprah: No. The lie of it!
Audience: (Thunderous applause).
This story has turned into the tale of how some bum who can spin a good yarn made The Great and Powerful Oprah look bad. “It’s difficult to talk to you because I really feel duped!” Poor rich Oprah...
I wonder if she’s still glad she chose him…
If you haven’t tired of reading about this guy and want to read some funny stuff, check out Jay Pinkerton’s Contested Pieces from Frey Memoir.
Anyway...I certainly did go on and on there...Sorry.
Valentine's Day
So Valentine's Day is fast approaching...What's everybody got planned? Personally, I find it hard to outdo some of the stuff I've done in the past. There's a guy I know who always gets annoyed whenever I do something nice for Lasagna. (I don't really go around telling people that stuff, but he always asks). He's the kind of guy that complains all the time and actually says the word "Sigh" more than anyone really should...I think he thinks that his wife will somehow find out and expect him to do more...I think that we should be nice all the time and not just wait for these consumer holidays to do nice stuff for people...(Yet I still go overboard at Christmas and Valentine's Day for some reason)...
If you've read this far...thanks.
Take care out there.
Your Pal,
Zambo.
P.S.
The UFC was pretty good.
posted by Zambo at 10:03 PM
7 Comments:
I cant believe I read the whole thing!! Hehehehe.
See, you hit the nail on the head about the Fry thing, this is why I had no desire to read it, and I am a book whore, I'll read almost anything.
Can you teach my Canadian your valentine's secrets??
Hey if that devilishly charming little chimp can remember Valentine's Day, so can humans. I personally am not much into the holiday...overcommercialization and such. If ya love someone, show it all the time, not just on some Hallmark Card Day. Same goes for Thanksgiving and such...if you're thankful, don't wait to show it.
BUT...if you are with someone who is really into it, then you'd damn better buy some flower and candy or whatever they give.
awww aren't you a sweetie Zambo..lucky lasagna :) i don't care much for v-day..just another day to me...:)
You are a sweet,sweet man.Lucky Lady Wife:)
I think your thoughts on Frey were brilliant!
I always laugh at us humans when mad panic occurs during a power outage.I am SO buying a generator...what would I do without my computer??? ;p
I agree with your whole take on that Frey as*hole. I suppose I am jealous too. I should have written my book 20 years ago. Heh.
Lasagne is a lucky lady Zambo. How long have you been married? And, when are you going to put your real face up on here?!?! I have this image of you in my head...and I am usually pretty acurate.
My blog is a mess. No blog roll or side panel content :( I am finding all of my blog buddies by jumping from comment box to comment box clicking on their profile pictures! So far I have been pretty lucky. I think we all have a mini blog web-ring type deal going on. Most of us visit the same blogs on a daily basis. Have you ever noticed that?
KK..I have babbled far too much in here :)
Have a great day Monkey Boi.
Peace,
SW
Lingo Slinger--
Are you sure you'd really want to be taken under Oprah's big old wing? My pet peeve was going to the bookstore and wanting to a buy a book and there's Oprah's big old stamp on it. Sure, if I published and she put her B.O.S. on it, I'd make lots and lots of money. But I'd hate to see that B.O.S. on my book.
Zambo,
Sorry to have been incommunicado lately. (Unfortunately, that is nothing like Inspirado.) The good news is that I am currently tapping away on my new laptop computer ... this is the first computer I have ever owned. I am so damn happy, it's sick. Now I have about a million little "computer projects" that I want to do ... because I have software that (theoretically) allows me to make DVDs and stuff, now I feel like I have to make a DVD and send it to you. We'll see if that ever happens!
The bad news is that I don't have the internet at home yet. Things being as they are here, I am sure it will be a huge pain in the ass, (imagine your Sirius problems, only in a different language) but I will investigate it this weekend. If, by some miracle, I get Connected, we can chat and stuff. That would be cool.
Thanks for your writings. I read about 2 weeks worth all at once ... I wonder if we can change our Blogger settings so that we don't have to go through stuff in reverse chronological order ... know'm saying?
Gob-less
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